Artist Rick Midler hand painted a pair of pants for me, after interviewing me about what I love and what I’m passionate about. The design reflects my values.
We’ve made friends with three couples after serendipitous conversations in bars. Two more who we were introduced to.
Apparently not everyone turns random meetings into real friendships, so this is what’s worked for us.
My life vision spells out what I want and my to-do list is how I’ll get there. My values clarify why I’m choosing that vision.
“Midlife crisis” implies something that hits like a car crash, intense and immediate, then you simply put your life back in order. But no, Brene Brown wisely counsels. It’s a slow burn.
Is wanting to change our behavior any more phony than wearing glasses, getting braces or going to the gym? What’s wrong with deciding you’d like to be a happier, healthier version of yourself who treats people better?
What you believe about yourself affects what you think is possible for yourself.
For example, an elite athlete might feel their muscles pushed almost to the point of collapse and think, “I am reaching peak performance! This is what I excel at.” I might feel that same level of exertion and think, “I’m not sure I can do this, I’m afraid I’m going to hurt myself. I should ease up.”
One person might feel butterflies before public speaking and think, “I’m so nervous, this is terrible!” while I might feel the same adrenaline rush and think, “I’m so excited! I can’t wait to do this.”
One of the magical things about decluttering is that it forces you to ask a wonderful question:
What is important to me in my life?
As you tackle a pile of clothes, a cluttered countertop, a shelf overflowing with books, there’s no way to get rid of clutter without answering that question.
I have come to enjoy wine and craft cocktails, and we love the social aspect of our neighborhood bars, where we know people.
But it’s time to cut down on booze to try to get my blood pressure back where it belongs.
I love salt. Given the choice between chocolate and French fries, I’ll have fries in my mouth when I answer. I have suggested that a salt lick on a necklace, like the candy necklaces of my childhood, would be an excellent invention.
But higher blood pressure points to the need to step away from the shaker.
In a few areas, it’s either-or — I love clothes and jewelry like Debbie and I take pride in my career like my mom — but I find the blends even more interesting. Like my mom, I value punctuality and find it rude when people are late, but like my stepmom, I get that life’s messy and some rules are meant to be broken.